EFF "Net Culture - Humor" Archive

Files in this Archive

200106_ip_first_they_came.html

An anonymous parody of Martin Niemoller's "First they came..." poem, mocking the MPAA/RIAA copyright fanatics. (June, 2001)

10_secrets.list

10 secrets to solving any possible computer problem

1999_antichain.letter.txt

an antidote to chain letters that catalogs and mocks the 7 most common types of stupid Internet chain letters.

abort_retry_ignore.poem

Parody of Poe's "The Raven." Gothic *and* computer-oriented...what could be better?

acad_programmers.guide

Guide to academic programmers, this covers every type of academic programmer there is.

anagrams_for_iway.topten

Great list of the top ten anagrams for "Information Superhighway."

barlows.law

Barlow's Law of Economics, John Perry Barlow (EFF co-founder).

bells.poem

Poem about the merging of the Baby Bells, based on "The Bells" by Edgar Allen Poe.

borg_windows.skit

Skit in which Picard & co. defeat the Borg with the help of MS Windows.

brown_superhighway.song

"The Data-Super-Highway Blues", by the EFF's own Dan Brown.

chicken.joke

Many great thinkers answering the question, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Especially good are the answers from Einstein, Dickinson, and Mr. T.

compugov.announce

Announcement of the sale of the government to a consortioum of corporations including IBM, Microsoft, and AT&T.

crypto_subpoena.hoax

News brief about the forthcoming release of a crypto book and the governemnt resulting government hysteria. Wildly funny.

cyberpasse.manifesto

Poking fun at cybereverything

dir_straits.song

Internet song to the tune of "Money for Nothing" by Dire Straits.

dont_think_too_hard.paper

HCE Syndrome. Don't think to hard or your head could explode!

dr_seuss.rhyme

A Dr. Seuss-style poem about computers.

eco_on_micros.excerpt

Excerpt from an Umberto Eco column in which he compares the Mac OS to Catholicism and DOS to Protestant Christianity. This contains an addition in which UNIX is shown to correspond to Judaism.

email_facts_of_life.txt

Updated netiquette classic - a humorously sarcastic guide to avoiding online hoaxes, chain letters, and frauds (and avoiding being someone known for perpetuating them.) Bonus: also includes the "Bad Times Virus" parody, and the "bOING bOING Anti- Chain Letter".

encryption_foils_coup.story

encryption_foils_coup.response

engineer.joke

An amusing joke about engineers, and a hilarious joke about Bill Gates, extraterrestrials and pyramids.

frog.joke

Funny joke about a "computer guy" and a frog.

gates_at_camp.story

gates_in_heaven.joke

gates.joke

Joke about high-powered computer execs.

gates.story

An account of Bill Gates's experiences in heaven.

geek.code

How do you know you are a geek and what kind of a geek are you?

geek_humor.joke

Like it says, geek humor. Very funny.

godwins.law

Godwin's Law of Nazi Analogies (and Corollaries), Mike Godwin (EFF staff cousel), et al.

greeting.0_9

Script to write a greeting card.

hacker_barbie.announce

Mattel's announcement of the new Hacker Barbie.

heaven.joke

A brief story about heaven and hell.

hoax_innoculation.post

a parody of a typical Net hoax, intended to mock such hoaxes and "innoculate" the reader against the "Internet Gullibility Virus."

hourly_net_traffic_update.joke

A sample "net traffic report," modeled after radio traffic reports.

insults.lists

Lists of flames from Usenet groups.

kibocorn.eff

This one's hard to describe...it's fairly amusing, though.

lucky.anti-letter

A counter-meme to idiotic "good luck" email chain letters. Incidentally, one of the funniest net-distributed parodies ever. Created by the publishers of _bOING_bOING_ magazine.

mccandlishs_bureaucracy.law

McCandlish's Law of Unjust Bureaucracy, Stanton McCandlish, EFF online activist, 1993.

mccandlishs_aphorisms.law

McCandlish's Law of Aphorisms, Stanton McCandlish, EFF communications coordinator, Jan. 20, 2000.

meat.story

Odd short story about aliens who perceive humans as nothing but sentient meat.

microsoft_bob.joke

Joke about Microsoft trademarking the name "Bob."

mouse_balls_ibm.memo

IBM memo about replacing mouse balls. This is a classic.

new_1040.form

The new 1040 form. Check it out so you understand come April 15.

opening.line

Awful, terrible, horrendous info-superhighway simile. This is truly unconscionable.

os_airline.joke

"If an O/S Ran Your Airline." Amusing.

os_creation.story

password_security.advise

poking_fun_at_rimm.joke

Marketing Death on the Info Superhighway by Paul Phillips, pokes fun at Marty Rimm and his "study".

postnews.faq

The classic FAQ on netiquette: Emily Postnews. Do the *opposite* of what it suggests.

p-c_unix.joke

A list of politically correct UNIX commands.

pgp.song

Song about PGP, written by Leslie Fish.

pict2.song

Song about the government oppressing the poor computer users by Isaac Bonewitz (based on Leslie Fish/Rudyard Kipling "Pict Song")

sex_occupation.joke

Joke about how different men of professions, such as Microsoft employees, make love differently.

software_metrics.joke

A collection of metrics by which to measure the status of a project.

squish.hoax

Description of an internet contest (actually a hoax, as the filename suggests).

star_trek.joke

Skit in which Picard & co. defeat the Borg with the help of MS Windows. (Also known as borg_windows.skit)

super_highway_humor.joke

joke about the NSF and the national information superhighway

taglines.list

A list of taglines, like the filename says. Most are pretty funny.

tarhk_future.song

"I Have Seen the Future" (to the tune of your favorite blues song).

tech_domination.joke

"How to determine if Technology has taken over your life."

unix.jokes

A few Unix jokes, which range from very funny to very corny.

unix2.jokes

More Unix jokes.

unix3.jokes

Yet more Unix jokes.

vanderleun_technoblatherism.parody

"Technoblatherism", a parody of the "Technorealistic Manifesto", by former dir. of the EFF Cambridge office, Gerard van der Leun.

wilcox-mccandlish.law

The Wilcox/McCandlish Law of Online Discourse Evolution (and Corollaries), Bryce Wilcox and Stanton McCandlish (EFF online activist).

Subdirectories in This Archive

Up to the Parent Directory

[no subdirectories]

Related On-Site Resources

[no Related On-Site Resources]

Links to Related Off-Site Resources

Jay's Comedy Club

A Vast Repository Of Humour . Now On Stage - New Items To The Archive . Topics To Tickle Your Fancy: . Additional Weirdness . Amusing Stories . Best Of The Usenet Oracle . Computer & Technology Jokes . Directions, Guides, & ...

Adrian's humor collection

Maintainer: . Adrian Powell . E-mail: adrian@cs.ualberta.ca . Go back to my home page My collection of text files that I found on rec.humor, rec.humor.funny, rec.humor.best-of-usenet, some ftp sites, and through the good-will of my friends. ...

Yahoo - Entertainment:Humor, Jokes, and Fun:Computer Humor

Entertainment:Humor, Jokes, and Fun:Computer Humor . Ada Cartoons - Some cartoons about the Ada programming lanuage. . Anti Windows - dedicated to all those Windows-lovers all over the world ...

LaughWEB Canonical Lists

Canonical Lists . The canonical list of... . Answering Machine Messages . ASCII Cows . Bart Simpson Blackboard Quotations . The Biggest Lies . Blonde Jokes . Bumper Stickers . Computer Hardware Humor . Fulldeckisms . Lightbulb Jokes . ...

Jokes & Quotations about Doctors, Lawyers & Politicians - Shareware

MCR Software's . Lowdown on Doctors, Lawyers & Politicians . Shareware Version 2.1 .

The Jokes

These are all the jokes we have in our archive so far, in the order of when we got them. New jokes will be added to the bottom each day that there is new jokes. Please vote on them. The voting system works only if you vote!

MCTFB's Conquered Domain

The Joker's List . Here Is A List Of Canonical Lists Of Jokes That The Joker Has Prepared For MCTFB. If You Are Offended By These Jokes, Well Then MCTFB Recommends That You See A Shrink Immediately. Also, One More Thing: The Joker Did Not ...

Humor (Leisure and Recreation) - Galaxy